..."In my own little corner, in my own little chair, I can be whatever I want to be..."
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
I've decided to start using Wed.'s to vent when I need to-----therefore the title of this post. No, it won't be every week. I really don't have time to do that-----sigh.
Today, I am going to whine about the fact that my hubby is out of work.......again. Last Friday, he broke the news to me that he had been laid off, and I sort of......well.......FREAKED!
Perhaps it had to do with the fact that just six months ago, he had a really bad accident at work, where he almost lost the third finger on his right hand. They had to re-build it. You might want to refresh your memory and read about it here.
Well, he was on disability, but of course, that doesn't pay all the bills-----and he was getting a small compensation from his workplace also, but that didn't cover the overtime that is required for us to....well......basically.....pay those darn bills. So, we have been trying to juggle things to get everything covered, and are still, basically, behind.
NOT a good time to be laid off, for sure.....
I work really hard---doing voice lessons, and trying to get the theatre off the ground and making something from that----someday----but it doesn't bring in a lot now, therefore I don't feel that I am prepared to take on any more debt problems.
I guess I am just P---O'd! I am getting so tired of being stressed out about money, and where its going to come from. I am getting older and sometimes wish that I could be like most of the women my age, with great houses, having vacations, re-decorating their houses, going shopping and just worrying about who to go to lunch with----occasionally babysitting the G-babies.
And another down-side to this extreme stress----I don't sleep well. I get panic attacks sometimes waking up at about 4:00 in the morning----not being able to breath, and panic-ing about how to get through all this. I have been working on getting caught up with everything, and I am FREAKING out how this will affect all that I have worked on.
Ok----just writing about this has made me feel like a total whiner. I apologize for going off, but if its only once in awhile-----can't a girl just GET THINGS OFF HER CHEST ONCE IN A WHILE!!
Now----end of the pity party.
I need to go out and do something for someone else. It always manages to take my mind off of my problems....