I'm Still So Vain, Or How I Realized That I Can't Talk To People Without My Makeup On

Every once in a while, something happens that shakes up my world.


As you all know, I am one of the vainest creatures that ever walked this planet. I mean, if I don't have my makeup on and you come to the door.....I won't answer.

If you need to refresh your memory about this, and one of the incidents that are a testimony to this fact, read about it here.

Well, to continue on with this story, (and yes, isn't it sometimes annoying how stories keep continuing on?) I took Aydan out to the bus about a month ago, and VOILA!....there was someone sitting in a car. It was a cold day, so I figured that one of the kids had missed the bus earlier on the route and the parent was dropping them off.

So, I didn't really think much about it. I nodded my head in the Dad's direction, as he got out to put his son on the bus with Aydan and then put it out of my mind.

Well, that afternoon, as I was sitting in my car, waiting for the bus to arrive, another car pulled up. It was frigid cold, mind you, or I would have gotten out and made polite conversation. (I had my makeup and was fully outfitted out by this time, mind you...)

Well, the woman in this car did exactly that.

She got out of her car and came over to introduce herself.

I, of course, rolled down my window. (I wasn't going to get out---I'm not stupid----my warm car was just fine, thank you very much----I leave socializing to warm times of the year.)

Well, after she introduced herself, she told me that her son was going to be at our bus stop now, as they were living in a rented house just down the street. I then realized that the name sounded familiar, and that, about a week before Christmas, her house had burned completely down when there was an explosion in the basement.

The family was all right, as they were in church. But, since they were on our bus route, the bus driver had asked for donations to help and we had all given some money for the cause.

So, as all this hit me,....I was struck by two things.

I felt very sorry for her loss and expressed this, as well as asked if there was anything that I could do---to which she replied that they were taken care of, as they had most of their relatives in the area and they had taken care of most of their needs.

Now, the second thing that struck me was this: HOLY CRAP, THAT MEANS THAT THERE IS GOING TO BE SOMEONE HERE EVERY MORNING AT MY BUS STOP AND I LOOK LIKE HOLY CRAP IN THE MORNING!!!

Ok, call me vain and pretentious, and yes, shallow----that's fine, I can handle it. I am used to jealous rejection.


Alright, so I know that this story needs a long story short version, so I will cut to the chase.


I went out the next morning----with my weird hat, scarf, huge bulky coat, snow boots, and sweats version of me. I thought to myself: "You can DO IT, girl! Don't worry that you look like you are in a scary movie and you are the one doing the scaring!"

I arrived at the bus stop and there was this nice looking man standing there, smiling................

......AND I FROZE!!! I MEAN----FROZE!! (I know that this is the perfect choice of word, as it was also wicked cold outside at the time)

I nodded my head and turned away and couldn't for the life of me say a bloody thing!!


WHAT THE HECK? WHERE IS MY BUBBLY PERSONALITY, MY CHARM, MY SASSYNESS?

All gone. All stuck behind the face that I felt was horrific!

Now, I am sure that you are all nodding your heads, tsk, tsking at the waste of such a brilliant human being hidden behind huge winter wear.




The next question that is foremost in your minds is this: "What has she done every day since?"

Well, I now wait until the LAST possible minute to run out and put Aydan on the bus. If the bus is ever late, I am forced to mumble something inane about the weather, or how hard it is to wait for the bus in the cold.

Its PITIFUL!

I even tried to wear some lip gloss one day, to see if that would help. I'm sure that the poor man had to try to stop staring at me with my peachy lips that contrasted so HUGELY with my white pasty face. I have no idea what he thought....

I always see his wife in the afternoons when the bus arrives, and I wonder if she ever mentions anything about me----like how nice and conversational I am, and isn't it amazing how many different coats that I have to go with my hats and boots---you know, girl talk.


I'm sure that he is quite positive that the creature in the morning must be a different person than the one she is talking about.


Which is just fine with me.