A Surprise Visit

While I was driving to New York, I got a phone call from a number that I didn't recognize. After a few minutes, the phone bleeped that there was a voice message, so I listened to the message. It was from my youngest daughter, Maryn. She was calling from her boyfriends phone and wanted me to call her!

My heart sang.

I hardly ever get to talk to her, since she moved to Ohio, and a phone call from her was nothing short of a miracle!

So, I quickly called the number back-----to hear what was going on.

She asked me where I was.

"Driving to New York for a gig," I replied-----to which she said----"Oh, noooooo!"

"What?" I said.

"I'm on my way to Boston---to surprise you!" she replied.


My heart sank.

She was going to be in Boston just one day and night, as she had a show there, then her band was going on to Brooklyn. She didn't want to tell me as she wanted to walk into the house and surprise me.

I almost started crying just thinking about it.


So, after talking to her for a bit, I got off the phone and called my hubby, Bret. I told him the story and asked if he could connect with her and maybe take her to dinner or something----just see how she was and just.....well.......give her the hug that I wouldn't be able to give her.


After I arrived at the resort where our band was playing, I tried to call, but there wasn't very good cell service. After sound check, though-----I tried again.......and I got through!
Maryn answered and I talked to her again----as she and my hubby were walking after eating out. They sounded like they were having a good time, and it made me feel happy that she was close to my hubby, so that she and her boyfriend could hang out together with he and Aydan.

But I wasn't there-----and yes, it hurt.

I had been thinking about her a lot lately. I generally think of my children every day. I wonder what they are doing right at that moment and whether they are making good decisions.
I guess that when they grow up and move away, it never changes-----you still worry about them and want to protect them.

I was changing purses about a week ago, as the handle of my old one started breaking, so I had to move things from one purse to another. I came across a small letter that Maryn had given me when she was about 12. She had given me the letter, along with a little bear, to hug when she wasn't there.

Do you remember how I told you that Maryn is the best "hugger" ever? Well, she is----she envelopes you in her embrace and you just want to hang on forever....

But the letter was so adorable. It is why I carry it in my purse.....still. She told me how much she loved me and how much she will always be there for me to hug----whenever I needed it.

And.....yes......well.......I always cry when I read it, because I don't get to have her here when I want that hug.

Its so hard to describe the feelings that you have when your children leave.

I heard this song by Ingrid Michaelson about three days ago, and I had to post the lyrics. I tried to find it on You Tube, but they didn't have a video of it, but I found a copy of it on the internet----at http://new.music.yahoo.com/ingrid-michaelson/tracks/ so you can hear it-----just scroll down to Highway and give a listen-----it is amazing, because it describes my feelings about my little Maryn.


Highway

On a highway along the Atlantic I'm rifling through these last 17 years
The radio waxes romantic. It's lullabies fill our eyes with tears

We don't say a word
There's nothing to say that hasn't been heard
And how you've grown my little bird
I'm regretting letting you fly

6 pounds and 7 ounces. A ball of bones and flesh and tears were you
Now your hands, your tiny pink hands, grew larger than my hands ever grew

We don't say a word
There's nothing to say that hasn't been heard
And how you've grown my little bird
I'm regretting letting you fly
I'm regretting letting you fly
I'm regretting letting you fly

On a highway. On a highway.

Maryn with her boyfriend, and then a cute look for the camera----sporting her

new blonde look!

Yes, my little bird, I'm definitely regretting letting you fly....