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Sunday, August 09, 2009

A Surprise Visit

While I was driving to New York, I got a phone call from a number that I didn't recognize. After a few minutes, the phone bleeped that there was a voice message, so I listened to the message. It was from my youngest daughter, Maryn. She was calling from her boyfriends phone and wanted me to call her!

My heart sang.

I hardly ever get to talk to her, since she moved to Ohio, and a phone call from her was nothing short of a miracle!

So, I quickly called the number back-----to hear what was going on.

She asked me where I was.

"Driving to New York for a gig," I replied-----to which she said----"Oh, noooooo!"

"What?" I said.

"I'm on my way to Boston---to surprise you!" she replied.

My heart sank.

She was going to be in Boston just one day and night, as she had a show there, then her band was going on to Brooklyn. She didn't want to tell me as she wanted to walk into the house and surprise me.

I almost started crying just thinking about it.

So, after talking to her for a bit, I got off the phone and called my hubby, Bret. I told him the story and asked if he could connect with her and maybe take her to dinner or something----just see how she was and just.....well.......give her the hug that I wouldn't be able to give her.

After I arrived at the resort where our band was playing, I tried to call, but there wasn't very good cell service. After sound check, though-----I tried again.......and I got through!
Maryn answered and I talked to her again----as she and my hubby were walking after eating out. They sounded like they were having a good time, and it made me feel happy that she was close to my hubby, so that she and her boyfriend could hang out together with he and Aydan.

But I wasn't there-----and yes, it hurt.

I had been thinking about her a lot lately. I generally think of my children every day. I wonder what they are doing right at that moment and whether they are making good decisions.
I guess that when they grow up and move away, it never changes-----you still worry about them and want to protect them.

I was changing purses about a week ago, as the handle of my old one started breaking, so I had to move things from one purse to another. I came across a small letter that Maryn had given me when she was about 12. She had given me the letter, along with a little bear, to hug when she wasn't there.

Do you remember how I told you that Maryn is the best "hugger" ever? Well, she is----she envelopes you in her embrace and you just want to hang on forever....

But the letter was so adorable. It is why I carry it in my purse.....still. She told me how much she loved me and how much she will always be there for me to hug----whenever I needed it.

And.....yes......well.......I always cry when I read it, because I don't get to have her here when I want that hug.

Its so hard to describe the feelings that you have when your children leave.

I heard this song by Ingrid Michaelson about three days ago, and I had to post the lyrics. I tried to find it on You Tube, but they didn't have a video of it, but I found a copy of it on the internet----at so you can hear it-----just scroll down to Highway and give a listen-----it is amazing, because it describes my feelings about my little Maryn.


On a highway along the Atlantic I'm rifling through these last 17 years
The radio waxes romantic. It's lullabies fill our eyes with tears

We don't say a word
There's nothing to say that hasn't been heard
And how you've grown my little bird
I'm regretting letting you fly

6 pounds and 7 ounces. A ball of bones and flesh and tears were you
Now your hands, your tiny pink hands, grew larger than my hands ever grew

We don't say a word
There's nothing to say that hasn't been heard
And how you've grown my little bird
I'm regretting letting you fly
I'm regretting letting you fly
I'm regretting letting you fly

On a highway. On a highway.

Maryn with her boyfriend, and then a cute look for the camera----sporting her

new blonde look!

Yes, my little bird, I'm definitely regretting letting you fly....


FitToSeeJane said...

Oh, how sweet. To know she was thinking of you and trying to suprise you, and that it didn't work out is a little sad. But to have a great daughter and a good relationship like it sounds like you have, makes those little things OK.

Alyson (New England Living) said... heart hurt for you when I read that you missed that visit. I can only imagine what that's like. Oh, and that song makes me want to cry!

By the way, I'm going to try to come up to your ward sometime in the late fall. Can't wait to see you!

Christy said...

Oh I'm so sorry you missed her visit...I can just feel your pain right through the computer screen. Maybe you can plan a surprise visit to her sometime soon?

tiburon said...

Awww that made my heart break too :(

Jan said...

That was just beautiful. I think that is so sweet that she was going to surprise her, and I also could feel your heart drop when you weren't going to be there.

That little note is the sweetest too. I love the sentiment of those precious memories. They are what keep us going and strong and surrounded in that love zone of life.

Take care and this was really nice to wake up too :)

Renee said...

Awww, it's too bad you missed her. I would be so sad too. Maybe you can go and see her? I have notes from my girls that I keep in a box on my dresser. Perhaps when they are big and grown, I will keep them in my purse too. So they will always be with me too. Sniff.

Kate Coveny Hood said...

That's too bad that you missed her. Your daughters (and son of course) sound amazing.

Megg said...

I have received hugs from Maryn and you are right! She does give really good hugs.

M-Cat said...

How cool that she wanted to surprise you!!!

And I'm with you, I think about my kids every single day.....

miche said...

SAD! I can't believe you missed her!

Melissa B. said...

Such a poignant post...Hope y'all catch up soon, so she can give you one of her super hugs!

Jen said...

I love your quote from Cinderella. I sing those songs all of the time. Visiting from SITS.

Omgirl said...

She is a cutie pie! But I'm sorry things didn't work out. What are the chances?!

Shelle-BlokThoughts said...

okay that made me cry... I'm didn't know you lived so close to New York... i would have loved to meet you! Hope the gig went okay...

Kristin said...

Awwwwwwww. I'm so sorry. I'm already dreading the time I'll have to let him fly and he's only one.

The Redhead Riter said...

She looks so young!!!

Lani said...

oh what a bummer that you missed you daughter's visit! That is so sweet that you keep her letter:)

Ronnica said...

Missed hard! My family all lives in Kansas (I'm in NC), so I don't get to see them as much as any of us wishes!

Shauna said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
carma said...

congrats on your win :-)

your daughter sounds like a sweetie...

Oh, you know I'll be a wreck when my little birdie flies the coop. Who else is gonna test trash bags for me ;-)

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