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Thursday, September 04, 2008

Honesty....Is Such A Lonely Word

I have a very bad habit. Or maybe you would call it a weakness.

I am a trusting soul.

I tend to always believe what people tell me and trust them.

As usual, it has gotten me into trouble again.

Of course, you have read about my search for the perfect place for my new theatre ventures. Or maybe you haven't; if not, you can read about it here. I still haven't found someone to share the space with, by the way----even though I have a belly dancer who is renting it by the hour----two hours a week, anyway. That doesn't make much of a dent in the rent, but I will take what I can get...

But back to the subject at hand. I did have a successful summer in the space, doing Musical Theatre camps there, and ended up with a record number of students in my last camp, with 17 students! It was a lot of work, as I write the shows that we do and then choreograph them, and the students learn them to perform on the last day---this while trying to do acting exercises, vocal exercises, teaching costuming and stage hair and makeup! Its crazy....and STRESSFUL!

So, naturally, the week with the 17 students was the most stressful, and I now swear that I am NOT going to put more than 15 in a class----EVER!!

Well, this brings me to my weakness. There was this Dad that had put his daughter in the camps last summer. Two of the camps, actually. But he is one of these kind of Dads that show up on the first day----never pre-registered, no paperwork, hands you a wad a cash and says that his daughter is ready to take the class. Well, of course, you don't turn him away, and you scramble to get a folder and supplies ready for the girl. She is a cutie and talented, so no worries.

So, this year I got an e-mail from him at the first of the summer. I guess that he had found my e-mail on my Facebook page. (He is one of my "friends"----this is where I am making a face...)
He wanted to see when the dates for the camps were for this summer, and was interested in having his daughter take them again. Well, I was rather surprised and excited that he was trying to enroll her BEFORE the class started, so I wrote back...

He then wrote back to me a few weeks later, telling me that his daughter did, indeed, want to take my camp again,---and he told me which one----and not only that, but his other two daughters wanted to take the camp also! "Wow!" I thought, "Thats great!" He then went on to inform me that he had to figure out how they would get there---he had to arrange the rides for them, etc., as he was no longer living with them, as he was going through a divorce, etc.

"Hang on," you are saying. "Did I just read a 'red flag'?" Divorce? And what is he doing for a living? Well, he said that he was bartending, so I thought that was probably why he paid in cash.

I'm sure that you are way ahead of me by now.

You are very smart.

You are not the trusting type like me.

I already admire you for that.

So, he then wrote me to tell me that he wouldn't be able to bring the girls, as their Grandma was going to, but that he would see me on the last day, when he came to see the show, and HE WOULD PAY ME THEN.

Oh,..........no..........not that, Shawn. You are obviously not that stupid and moronic.

Yes, I am. I believed him. I spent that week going through the worst stress of any theatre camp I had done---busting my buttocks to work with 17 students. And when he came on the last day,
(YES, HE HAD THE NERVE TO COME AND SEE THE SHOW!!) and I asked him about the money, he had the gall to say, "Oh, my wife didn't pay? I thought that SHE was going to!"

So, he took my address and promised to send it in the mail...

Its been over three weeks now, and of course, I have not seen any of the money. I have e-mailed him, and we even went by the Grandma's house to harass her. (Bret did that, not me----I could NEVER!) We got his number----he was living with his Dad,----puh-leeeze----but his Dad said that he had moved out and didn't know how to get ahold of him----RIGHT, uh, huh... I even wrote a Facebook reminder----something like----"this is your conscience speaking".... Nothing....

The problem is that I was counting on that money to pay my rent on my new space for Sept. I have been trying to make a go of this business for about three years now----never getting any money from grants, (I'm too brain dead to know how to write to get one) and never have had a loan (my credit is too bad---because of my first marriage, but that's another story)----so I have used every dime that I have made to put right back into my business. My dream... (Cue the teary-eyed music)

Blah, blah, blah....you are saying...I don't want to hear your sob stories any more... There are people with a WHOLE lot more problems than you! I know....I hear you....

But here I am, SCREWED over again and all because I am a trusting person.

So, what is a girl to do?

It sucks.

So, do any of you have stories about your trusting nature? I could so use a few....

....to make me feel better.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

I think that you are in trouble there.

What a jerk. I hope that your future endeavors work out better.

Shawn said...

Thanks for commenting...

I wish that I knew who you were, as I would love to rely on you---as I can't get my friends or family to comment...

You go...

Hailey said...

Hey! I was trying to think of a story about my trusting nature! And I still can't!

the hot'ns said...

You don't know me but I found your blog through your daughter Hailey's. (She doesn't know me either. I found her blog through Eric Snider's.) I'm not as creepy as I sound, and you can trust that! I'm just a normal mom in Michigan who finds your life so interesting. Here's my trusting nature story: When I was in college some random guy called me up and said that he had seen me at work (I worked in the campus library) and wanted to know if he could take me out that night. He (or his friend, I don't remember) was a pilot and wanted to take me for a ride in the plane. Stupidly, I said yes. I'm sure it's just because I was flattered. But he called back later and had to reschedule. I didn't hear from him. Fast forward to my next year in college and the same guy calls me again. He reminded me that I agreed to go out with him and wanted to know when we could make the date. This time I was smart enough to say, "wait, I don't even know you're name, what you look like, if you have a prison record, and mostly you don't have the nerve to introduce yourself to me face to face (I still worked at the library). Why would I go out with some random guy like this? Looking back, I'm glad I said no that time. Flattered or not, that story could have had a really scary ending!

Shawn said...

Wow! That is really scary!

I am glad that I just get creepy "no-pay guys"---compared to creepy "hey, how about I end your life" guys!

Scary, "hot'ns"! I will have to check out your blog...

Hope you come back.

I seem to scare away most folks.

Its my charm, I guess...

Anonymous said...

Hey,

I like to post but just not on the puter to often. I'm like Hailey trying to think of a story, but can't. I know I have been trusting, but no good stories.

Anonymous said...

Ooo! Okay, I've got one for you.

Right about the time I realized I needed a roommate to help me with rent, an aquaintance of mine told me she had been thrown out of her lover's house and needed a place to stay. She told me a sad story about how her lover would regularly beat her up, and how she had just been in the hospital for a seizure. When she got out of the hospital, the lover's mom (who they had been living with) threw the girl out. She had $ to give me right away for rent, and it seemed like kismet. Poor girl! Of course I would help her out, and in the process she would be helping me.

Well, turns out the story was slightly different than she had portrayed. Turns out she had a seizure because, as she explained when she was drunk one night, she took a handful of her antidepressants in order to make the lover mad. This should have been my first clue that this person wasn't honest. But I continued to believe in her, and see only the best. I thought perhaps living with me could be a stabilizing influence.

She had a job at a deli with a verbally abusive completely unprofessional boss who didn't give her a single day off in over 30 days. She finally got tired of it and quit. The first two weeks she spent moping (and drinking), the third week she made an effort of looking for a job. The entire month she assured me that even if she didn't find something right away, she had the rent covered. Okay, I thought, great. I believe you. But the week before rent was due she didn't come home. I knew she was avoiding me for a reason, but I still stubbornly clung to my belief in her supposed goodness. The day before rent was due she came back and told me "I couldn't find a job [after looking for only a week] so I went back to the deli [with the abusive boss]. Oh, and I spent my rent $ at the bar, so I don't have it. And I'm moving back in with my [abusive] lover." And to top it all off, she tried to get me to feel sorry for her by telling me this: "And I didn't fill out my paperwork for my hospital stay in time, so now they're charging me full price, which is several thousand dollars which I can't afford... oh, and I'm really prone to blood clots, and I have a blod clot in my leg, and I'm supposed to be taking asprin everyday, and I haven't been." This person is over 200 pounds. A blood clot is a serious problem. I looked at her in horror. I have never met someone--or at least, let someone like this get so close to me--who consistently creates, seeks out, and participates in drama in her life. At each turn, she had different, better choices she could have made, yet she chose again and again to go down a path of pain and suffering. Frankly, I just didn't know that there were people out there who live their lives like that. Or, I knew intellectually, but didn't fully comprehend. I guess that makes me pretty naive, but it was a good lesson all in all. And thankfully, my rent check didn't bounce, and I was able to scramble and get a new roommate--a nice stable older gentleman--who is completely down to earth and who I can depend on. So it all worked out in the end. For me anyway.

Does that make you feel any better?

;)

~Omy

Shawn said...

Hey Omy,
I am just glad that your story turned out! Whew! at least it worked out for you, moneywise...

I have been in the hole with other things, because of this guy and the money he owes me----aaarrrgggghhh. I still get mad over it.

I do feel a bit better, though, that I am not the only gullible person in the world! :)

Thanks for commenting!

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