Nice Guys Finish Last

I really wanted to review holiday movies and the fact that I am the only person that didn't especially like the King Kong movie.... I found it way too stressful and the best part of it was the ape.... I decided that I want him to be my friend....

But then, certain events in my life have made me turn from my favorite way of escaping...movies...and think about some other, deep mysteries of life....

....like why is it that nice guys/girls always finish last?

I have gone through my life, being a bit of a rebel, but really actually being a nice person. I don't do much road rage. (unless I'm really late) I tend to be short sometimes with retail workers, but only because they tend to be more inept than when I was one, and actually really DID know how to count back money!
I think that I am a fair mother, and when I asked my kids to do something, always added a "please" after it, so they didn't feel as if I was ordering them about... (This I decided to do, when in high school I saw a woman totally berate and tell her child what to do...loudly...in public....much like a dog...) I try not to gossip about people, and even though I come across as an aggressive person, who doesn't care what anyone thinks of me, I really just want people to like me and I want to be accepted for who I am..

So, why is it, that I feel that no matter what I do, I can't ever get ahead?

You know.....in that financially, "making my dreams come true" sort of way...

I can't really relate the specific events that happened that caused me to
re-evaluate this situation, as those involved would certainly retaliate....but lets just say that I feel that certain people have taken a knife to my chest, cut my heart out, then cooked it for dinner and eaten it, right before me....

I keep thinking back on choices that I have made to get to where I am now.....

Perhaps I should have joined that band after high school, and not gone to college...

Perhaps I should have never let my dad talk me into going to BYU that year...

Perhaps I should have gone to Milan to model when I was offered and left my two small children...

Perhaps I should have tried out for those movies that required me to use language that I didn't think was right...

Perhaps I shouldn't have gone skiing that New Years day...

Perhaps I should have not let someone move me all over the country every two years...

Perhaps I shouldn't have had Norwegian "nannies" for my kids while they were small, so I could model and do commercials...

Perhaps I should have been the kind of person that doesn't care about fashion, makeup, hair, and how I look...

Perhaps I should have stayed in California, and never had "seasons" again...

Perhaps I should have been more strict with my children and not tried to be their "friend"...

Perhaps I should stop trying to make it as a singer---even though I have tried for over 25 years...

Perhaps I should go back to college, then I could be hired as a drama teacher, even though I have enough experience to do it, without....

Perhaps I should have been a nurse, like my father wanted me to, or gone to business school, or gotten my real estate license and sold expensive properties, or just married a filthy rich man..........

........Now, wait a minute.....THAT is the only decision that I don't question....I know that my hubby is the only one for me....of course....we are MEANT for each other.........you may ask "Why"?

Because.......he's a nice guy......